The weekend is almost here (yahoo!) and since we are all sort of vamping here until the next holiday rolls around, below are a few things to do or consider for this weekend. Hurricane relief still dominates, but I'm looking for other things as well - give a shout out if you've got ideas, we'll post 'em.
Hurricane Relief
Yes, there's still much to do for a while, and though much of the work now involves mucking out basements (not a great activity for kids), Occupy Sandy still needs volunteers for cooking and food distribution, The site at 520 Clinton Ave. is still open, and will be receiving and dispatching volunteers but the Sunset Park location is closing. Saturday and Sunday, volunteers are needed at St. John's Episcopal Church in Bay Ridge - more information here. Also, New York Cares is still coordinating volunteer activities, but you do have to fill out an application and then can search the site for activities. They list a number of activities involving sorting and distributing resources in the Rockaways this weekend that are kid appropriate.
World AIDS Day - December 1st
Saturday is World AIDS Day, and while there doesn't seem to be much happening in NY that says 'bring the kids', all Housing Works Thrift Shops will be accepting donations of clothing, accessories and home goods for people living with HIV/AIDS. You can find a list of Thrift Shop locations here. Nice idea to take the family and bring some things to donate.
The MillionTreesNYC Project
Did you know that there are 60,000 new street trees in New York City? MillionTreesNYC is holding a workshop for its Stewardship Corps on Sunday, from 2pm to 4pm in Brooklyn, at 232 Varet Street. It's free, and open to kids with a grownup along. You'll learn how to care for trees, how to plant bulbs in tree pits. If you pledge to take care of one street tree, you'll get a gardening kit and an official volunteer card. All information and registration information here.
We Belong Together Campaign
I posted about this last week, but there's still a wee bit of time to join this project. The We Belong Together Campaign is trying to gather 20,000 letters and pictures by the end of November from children asking legislators to stop deportations and detentions that tear families apart. The campaign focuses in particular on immigrant families of mixed status, with some members having green cards and others living with documents, at risk of deportation. The website, which also lists its sponsors here, has an activity guide for working with kids on the project.
Helping the libraries?
So earlier this week a wise person pointed me to this story in the Times about the role libraries are playing in the Rockaways and elsewhere (Red Hook, too) to anchor folks in storm ravaged areas, and the fact that a number of branches were badly hurt by the storm. So I'm looking for ways to get folks and their kids involved, but it has gelled yet. The challenge here is that you can collect and donate books, but the reality is they probably need money more, to replace what they've lost. Anyway, watch this space, or send me your ideas, suggestions, or 'you idiot this is already happenings'.
And a reminder...
There are a couple of family volunteering activities coming up being organized by Hannah Senesh Country Day School. On December 16th and February 3rd, from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m, folks will be preparing and serving food at the Masbia Soup Kitchen at 4114 14th Ave. in Brooklyn. Anyone interested should RSVP here.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Monday, November 26, 2012
#Giving Tuesday, or Making the Most of a Hashtag Holiday
So last week's roundup of activities included mention of #Giving Tuesday, an attempt to at least parallel (if not shift) Black Friday's launch of the spending season leading up to the December holidays with the start of a giving season. Idealistically, the campaign hopes not only to encourage people to give to charities but also to have them crow about it in social media, spreading the word and momentum about the need to give to organizations, causes, people that we care about and which enrich our community and depend on our support. It's a fine idea, even if one may question (see, e.g. this critique) whether this will ultimately increase giving over all, or change our national pattern of giving to charity (in which giving clumps up in the month before the end of the tax year anyway), or whether it will be heard above the ca-ching ca-ching of spending at the mall.
It is also an opportunity to begin or continue a conversation with your kids about why you give to charitable organizations, and which ones you care about, or even why you think giving to charity is the wrong thing to do to improve your community and what you advocate instead. I mentioned last week that this page includes some activities for families to do, and I think there are some good ideas there whether or not you link them to this event. A number of them involve ways of creating a regular habit of giving small amounts -- seasonally, monthly, marking holidays -- throughout the year, and using that plan to foster a family discussion about how and where to give. I haven't tried this yet, but it seems to make sense as an approach (and is echoed by other sites discussing how to introduce kids to charitable giving). Kids tend to like rituals and routines and they may become bigger sticklers for keeping with it than you are, if you're lucky. It also makes sense to really think through what you are likely to maintain, because, as with a lot of things involving children, consistency matters. So, if you are unlikely to convince your kids without a struggle to skip meals or forego small treats periodically and give the money you'd spend on the meal to a charity of their choosing then pick something else.
Obviously, you can participate in the day (or not) by writing a check to an organization or in support of a cause important to you, but it's harder to involve children in that. If you want to do something tomorrow and haven't planned ahead, here are a few ideas that you can accomplish on a work day that can involve kids - these are ideas, not endorsements:
It is also an opportunity to begin or continue a conversation with your kids about why you give to charitable organizations, and which ones you care about, or even why you think giving to charity is the wrong thing to do to improve your community and what you advocate instead. I mentioned last week that this page includes some activities for families to do, and I think there are some good ideas there whether or not you link them to this event. A number of them involve ways of creating a regular habit of giving small amounts -- seasonally, monthly, marking holidays -- throughout the year, and using that plan to foster a family discussion about how and where to give. I haven't tried this yet, but it seems to make sense as an approach (and is echoed by other sites discussing how to introduce kids to charitable giving). Kids tend to like rituals and routines and they may become bigger sticklers for keeping with it than you are, if you're lucky. It also makes sense to really think through what you are likely to maintain, because, as with a lot of things involving children, consistency matters. So, if you are unlikely to convince your kids without a struggle to skip meals or forego small treats periodically and give the money you'd spend on the meal to a charity of their choosing then pick something else.
Obviously, you can participate in the day (or not) by writing a check to an organization or in support of a cause important to you, but it's harder to involve children in that. If you want to do something tomorrow and haven't planned ahead, here are a few ideas that you can accomplish on a work day that can involve kids - these are ideas, not endorsements:
- Ask your kids to help you pick out items from the Occupy Sandy Registry on Amazon. Send blankets or diapers or hand warmers.
- Contribute to the "Virtual Food Drive" organized by the Food Bank for New York City and DoSomething.org; you can browse the food categories and put items in your shopping cart and then charge them. This allows the food bank to buy the food wholesale rather than collecting cans from individual donors.
- Give a cow, a plant, or some honeybees at Heifer International.
- Go buy some warm breakfast treats and bring them to the crossing guard near your school - not a charity exactly, but a reminder to thank people who help you in small ways every day.
Your ideas? Are you buying into this hashtag holiday? Why or why not?
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Things you can do THIS weekend and beyond
So tomorrow is Thanksgiving, the kids are out of school Friday, the traditional holiday tsunami of consumerist frenzy is about to overtake the country, what can you do to staunch the flow just a bit? Funny you should ask. Here are some opportunities in the coming week and beyond:
Hurricane Relief
Although most power is now restored for those who have houses to return to, many people in the Rockaways, Coney Island, Staten Island and New Jersey are still homeless or trying to rebuild or salvage damaged homes. There will be a lot of work to do in the near future, and kids can continue to help collect and sort donations of food and other items, food preparation, etc.
Black Friday
Across the country Walmart workers and supporters are demonstrating in front of Walmart stores on the Friday after Thanksgiving to call attention to efforts by Walmart to retaliate against employees who speak out on workers' rights. For more info, look here. There aren't any events in New York City proper, but if you're visiting family somewhere else, you can spend some time (and take a break from leftovers) out there lending your support. Kids can talk to folks on the picket lines about why they're protesting and what it means for their families and their kids. You can find an event near you here.
#Giving Tuesday
The basic idea behind #Giving Tuesday is to create a national day of charitable giving in the midst of the holidays, following on the heels of Black Friday and Cyber Monday, two days devoted to shopping and spending on STUFF. Okay, so maybe it's a bit hokey, but it could be a great opportunity to engage your kids in a discussion of why we think about giving to others and not just about getting the things we want, and to plot out ways to give back in the coming year. There's a nice list of ideas for families here, developed by staff at the 92nd St. Y, which is the big nonprofit leading the effort. I like this list because it includes ongoing activities that can be incorporated into your family rituals going forward, encouraging regular mindfulness without overtaxing busy lives.
We Belong Together Campaign
The We Belong Together Campaign is trying to gather 20,000 letters and pictures by the end of November from children asking legislators to stop deportations and detentions that tear families apart. The campaign focuses in particular on immigrant families of mixed status, with some members having green cards and others living with documents, at risk of deportation. The website, which also lists its sponsors here, has an activity guide for working with kids on the project.
Coming up in a few weeks.....
There are a couple of family volunteering activities coming up being organized by Hannah Senesh Country Day School. On December 16th and February 3rd, from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m, folks will be preparing and serving food at the Masbia Soup Kitchen at 4114 14th Ave. in Brooklyn. Anyone interested should RSVP here.
Hurricane Relief
Although most power is now restored for those who have houses to return to, many people in the Rockaways, Coney Island, Staten Island and New Jersey are still homeless or trying to rebuild or salvage damaged homes. There will be a lot of work to do in the near future, and kids can continue to help collect and sort donations of food and other items, food preparation, etc.
- Occupy is organizing Thanksgiving meals tomorrow, if you're looking to do some volunteering. Go to 9818 Fort Hamilton Parkway, where they will be cooking in the morning. 520 Clinton Ave. will be closed on Thanksgiving. The St. Jacobi Church (4th Ave. between 54th and 55th) will be taking in and dispatching volunteers until 2pm on Thanksgiving (no donations on that day).
- Coney Recovers no longer needs Thanksgiving volunteers, but still need donations of canned goods, diapers, paper goods, toilet paper, baby food and blankets. You can take a trip out there with the kids and some stuff between 9:30 and 2:00. Check the link for locations.
Black Friday
Across the country Walmart workers and supporters are demonstrating in front of Walmart stores on the Friday after Thanksgiving to call attention to efforts by Walmart to retaliate against employees who speak out on workers' rights. For more info, look here. There aren't any events in New York City proper, but if you're visiting family somewhere else, you can spend some time (and take a break from leftovers) out there lending your support. Kids can talk to folks on the picket lines about why they're protesting and what it means for their families and their kids. You can find an event near you here.
#Giving Tuesday
The basic idea behind #Giving Tuesday is to create a national day of charitable giving in the midst of the holidays, following on the heels of Black Friday and Cyber Monday, two days devoted to shopping and spending on STUFF. Okay, so maybe it's a bit hokey, but it could be a great opportunity to engage your kids in a discussion of why we think about giving to others and not just about getting the things we want, and to plot out ways to give back in the coming year. There's a nice list of ideas for families here, developed by staff at the 92nd St. Y, which is the big nonprofit leading the effort. I like this list because it includes ongoing activities that can be incorporated into your family rituals going forward, encouraging regular mindfulness without overtaxing busy lives.
We Belong Together Campaign
The We Belong Together Campaign is trying to gather 20,000 letters and pictures by the end of November from children asking legislators to stop deportations and detentions that tear families apart. The campaign focuses in particular on immigrant families of mixed status, with some members having green cards and others living with documents, at risk of deportation. The website, which also lists its sponsors here, has an activity guide for working with kids on the project.
Coming up in a few weeks.....
There are a couple of family volunteering activities coming up being organized by Hannah Senesh Country Day School. On December 16th and February 3rd, from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m, folks will be preparing and serving food at the Masbia Soup Kitchen at 4114 14th Ave. in Brooklyn. Anyone interested should RSVP here.
Sunday, November 18, 2012
Thanksgiving Chicken
Frankly, the blank slate piece really did throw me. When I went to public elementary school on the upper west side of Manhattan in the 1970s (the old, oddball, somewhat grungy, pre-"You've Got Mail" Upper West Side), Thanksgiving meant cutting tall feathers out of construction paper and stapling them to oaktag strips to make head dresses, and fashioning pilgrim hats out of black cardboard. We got a bit about Squanto, we got the pictures of long wooden tables laden with food, surrounded by happy diners seated Indian-Pilgrim-Indian-Pilgrim as if they had consulted some early American Emily Post. The story was a happy one, a celebration of collaboration across cultures, of everyone bringing something to the table, of that potent American myth of simultaneous diversity of origin and unity of purpose, and, ultimately, abundance for all. I'm not sure I understood all of that in the second grade, but that story was foundational to my education about American history.
That I cringe at this right now is an understatement. Still, as myths go, it's easy to see the attraction of this one. Particularly now as a parent interested in how we teach kids kids about the value of community and collaboration, I like the idea of finding examples from history, simple and close by, which make that point. Even better if they involve building relationships by cooking and sharing food. But the story as it was told to me (and generations of school children) is wrong on so many levels (historical accuracy being foremost) that it doesn't surprise me that four years into public education my daughter has no associations with this holiday except no school and turkey.
Every year, though, we celebrate this national holiday and have an opportunity to explain, invent, or re-invent what it means. So my question is this: what are you telling your children about Thanksgiving? Do you give up the early European settlers and native tribes altogether and start with Lincoln, who, in the midst of the Civil War, proclaimed the modern holiday as a national day of giving thanks to god? Do you try a more updated version of the story of the holiday's early origins as a harvest festival, and enrich the myth with more accurate details, including more of the perspective of the native peoples, and the violence perpetrated on them by the settlers and those that followed? Or highlight aspects of the story that seem relevant or valuable and simply stay silent on the rest? Or, do you bring out your copy of Howard Zinn's A People's History of the United States and debunk the myth from the beginning? And then sit down to your big family meal (pass the stuffing, please).
Holidays tend to bring out the worst of my ambivalence about fully opting into or out of the larger narratives of a particular cultural or religious tradition, and I worry about how this translates to a child. My inclination is to duck the question, but I'm fighting it. What about you?
Meanwhile we are going to go do some volunteering on Weds. night, helping to cook Thanksgiving Dinner at the Ascension Church (see the info on the Bulletin Board). Maybe I will have figured something out by then.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Things to do THIS weekend
So, my goal is to make this a regular mid-week post, a list of things you might do on the weekend if you wanted to squeeze in a bit of community work with child in tow. I am gradually building my list of contacts, and hope that soon this list will be longer and more various, but as tell my daughter, more times than she would probably like, you have to start somewhere. If you have ideas, either for this weekend, or for on-going or future activities post in the comments or shoot me an email.
The big thing we're looking at this weekend is....
Hurricane Relief
- When I last touched base with the Occupy Sandy folks, they (to the extent there is a 'they' there) confirmed that the two main distribution hubs, at 520 Clinton Ave. and 5406 4th Ave., will still be fully operational. Kids are definitely welcome, they help sorting stuff, making sandwiches, moving stuff around, and even making art to be sent off with bag lunches. It was suggested that if you haven't volunteered yet, you go to 520 Clinton Ave. They are open from 9 a.m. on, every day.
- On Saturday, you can help the Red Hook Community Farm, which has volunteer hours starting at 10 (and if you can get there then, that's helpful, I think for orientation). Check their website or facebook page for any last minute updates. I did this last Saturday (see Nov. 13 post) and thought it was a great, hands on activity to do with kids.
- You can sign up to volunteer through the Public Advocate's office. It's not clear from their site what the activities are, and whether kids are welcome (you can't get the list of activities without filling out the form, still in process as I write this). Will investigate some more and post more info when I get it.
- If you can get out to Coney Island, you can join Coney Recovers at 1904 Surf Ave, which is their "relief village". Activities involve giving out food, clothes and supplies, generally kid-friendly activities.
- In New Jersey, Occupy has a list of relief sites taking donations and doing distribution here. Check that page for regular updates. The site is good about identifying which sites don't want children because they're doing demolition.
Please let me know if I've missed something, or if there something you want me to look into.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Anatomy of a Good Day
I don't write about this here in the spirit of self-congratulation, but for the sake of analysis: what made this experience of volunteering with children work? How can that help us figure out how to find or create more of these kinds of activities. Here are my conclusions:
- The right fit between the host and volunteering children: In addition to running a working farm, providing youth leadership opportunities in Red Hook (and producing great vegetables!), Added Value works with New York City schools, including the Brooklyn New School, the public school Esme and Rafael attend, to provide farm-based learning. So, they knew what kids could do, welcomed them, gave them tasks that were age-appropriate but still -- very important -- useful and valuable to the farm. In this instance, the kids were not doing anything different from what the adults were doing, and everyone was contributing, and that made it feel like community.
- Well-organized (by somebody else): This volunteering event was organized by the wonderful PTA at the Brooklyn New School. On Friday, we received an email from the school and made a plan to show up. Easy. As I said in an earlier post, one of the challenges to fitting volunteering with our kids into our hectic lives is that it usually takes work and time just to find a place to go that allows (and values the contributions of) kids. All of us doing this individually is incredibly inefficient and usually means that it doesn't happen. I know, why doesn't somebody start a project to help take on that coordinating role, to make it easier? Funny, you should ask....
- The kids understood what they were doing: There are a lot of levels on which we could have explained the significance of our work that day, but the simplest one worked fine for seven-year olds: the farm was flooded, we needed to help them repair the damage. That's even easier to explain than hunger, somehow, and still entirely accurate. In some cases, kids may not completely understand exactly the whys and wherefores of what they're doing and that may not matter that much, in terms of what they get out of it: kids practice a lot of things before they really understand what they're doing, and the practice is key to future understanding. Still, I think this project worked well for us because the tasks and the goals were clear. In a future post, I want to take on the challenge of conducting political advocacy with younger kids, which is trickier (and I would love some guidance there).
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Beyond please and thank you.....
This project emerged out of a growing unease I've felt about the ways in which I've been failing my kid. Now, I should say, the fear that I'm failing my kid is itself not new, as I think that's been around since she first emerged, squalling, from the womb (well, admittedly, way before that). But the particular problem is this: like many parents, I fret over her education, I sign her up for dance, for swimming, for art classes, I drag her to 'enrichment' activities, and sign her up for camps, but all of these, as lovely as they are, and as great for her development as they are, focus for the most part on supporting her individual growth and achievement. I do this in the context of a larger culture that prioritizes individual achievement and personal success and justifies vast systemic inequalities through the language of equal opportunity self-bootstrapping (yes, I know, radically simplistic summary, but this is a blog, not a thesis).
What's missing in all of these nice activities is the opportunity to teach her what her role is in building the community, shaping the world in which we live, and the humility necessary to face our responsibilities to others and our fundamental interdependency with them. As much as I want her to be independent and strong and capable of achieving her dreams, it matters to me that she understand and accept that she has to do her best to bring others along with her, to give back as well as take, to contribute what she can to the ever-present need to make the world more just, more equitable, more sustainable, more beautiful, for everyone.
Like most parents, I have worked hard to teach my daughter to say "please" and "thank you" and "excuse me", the basic building blocks of respect for others, enacted usually before they are completely understood. This has been moderately successful. The same with the lessons on sharing, picking up after yourself, treating your friends well. These are excellent tools for responsible and caring citizens of the world. But my efforts to build on this, and connect her to larger social responsibilities, have been far less consistent.
There are a lot of good reasons for this. It's easier to sign a kid up for dance class than to find a place to volunteer with a kid in tow. Explaining the need to address injustice, poverty, violence and the bad behavior of adults to children requires explaining that those things exist (if you're lucky enough to not experience them yourself). We know that children learn best not through lectures but through modeling and practice through play. It's hard for all of us with our busy, oversubscribed lives to make room for this. Some faith communities provide these kinds of opportunities, through youth groups and social justice work, but options for the secular (among whom I count myself, proudly) are less evident. Some people turn to the Girl Scouts, or Boy Scouts, but these are not the right fit for every family.
So what do we do (because if you've read this far, well, then, I'm assuming you're flailing around like me)? Well, I'm doing this - starting a place to share ideas, pool information about opportunities, organize. Specifically, I'm starting out with two main goals here:
For the most part, this site will focus on younger children, elementary school age into middle school. There are some great sites and great opportunities out there for teenagers (and in my work life, I know a lot about those), and I will include links to those as they come in.
But enough about me. Tell me what you think. Are you interested? What should I include here? Send me ideas, criticisms, events, websites to post, books to read. This only works as a joint endeavor, so I look forward to hearing from you.
Nancy
What's missing in all of these nice activities is the opportunity to teach her what her role is in building the community, shaping the world in which we live, and the humility necessary to face our responsibilities to others and our fundamental interdependency with them. As much as I want her to be independent and strong and capable of achieving her dreams, it matters to me that she understand and accept that she has to do her best to bring others along with her, to give back as well as take, to contribute what she can to the ever-present need to make the world more just, more equitable, more sustainable, more beautiful, for everyone.
Like most parents, I have worked hard to teach my daughter to say "please" and "thank you" and "excuse me", the basic building blocks of respect for others, enacted usually before they are completely understood. This has been moderately successful. The same with the lessons on sharing, picking up after yourself, treating your friends well. These are excellent tools for responsible and caring citizens of the world. But my efforts to build on this, and connect her to larger social responsibilities, have been far less consistent.
There are a lot of good reasons for this. It's easier to sign a kid up for dance class than to find a place to volunteer with a kid in tow. Explaining the need to address injustice, poverty, violence and the bad behavior of adults to children requires explaining that those things exist (if you're lucky enough to not experience them yourself). We know that children learn best not through lectures but through modeling and practice through play. It's hard for all of us with our busy, oversubscribed lives to make room for this. Some faith communities provide these kinds of opportunities, through youth groups and social justice work, but options for the secular (among whom I count myself, proudly) are less evident. Some people turn to the Girl Scouts, or Boy Scouts, but these are not the right fit for every family.
So what do we do (because if you've read this far, well, then, I'm assuming you're flailing around like me)? Well, I'm doing this - starting a place to share ideas, pool information about opportunities, organize. Specifically, I'm starting out with two main goals here:
- Crowd-sourcing the challenge of raising socially responsible, engaged kids: I'm going to collect from wherever I can--depending on the readers of this blog, friends, the twitterverse, etc., to help--resources, links, volunteering opportunities, advice, etc. I absolutely can't do this on my own, and I'm no kind of expert, so I want YOU to help out here.
- Organizing group activities: Once this is underway for a bit, I am going to use this as a hub for organizing projects and activities that folks can join. It might involve a one-time group volunteering project like cleaning up a park, or helping kids develop and implement their own project around something they care about. There will be a facebook page, there will probably be a twitter account, but, for the start, I'm going to use this site to post activities. I'm relatively new to the blogging and posting world, so expect a bit of technological incompetence.
For the most part, this site will focus on younger children, elementary school age into middle school. There are some great sites and great opportunities out there for teenagers (and in my work life, I know a lot about those), and I will include links to those as they come in.
But enough about me. Tell me what you think. Are you interested? What should I include here? Send me ideas, criticisms, events, websites to post, books to read. This only works as a joint endeavor, so I look forward to hearing from you.
Nancy
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